Prepare with facts, not impressions

Before you meet, write down three or four examples of work that went well and the same number where things fell short. Use observable events: 'The Tuesday delivery went out without a check and the customer received the wrong size', not 'You are careless'. Dates and specifics make feedback fair and easier to hear.

Also decide what you want to be different afterwards. If you cannot describe the change in a sentence, you are not ready to have the talk.

Agree the purpose and set the tone

Tell the person in advance that you want to talk about how work is going, and give them a day's notice so they can reflect. Choose a private place and enough time, at least thirty minutes. Avoid scheduling it right after a conflict or at the end of a stressful day.

Open by saying what the meeting is for: 'I want to talk about the last quarter, what you are doing well, what needs to improve and how I can help.' People relax when they know the shape of the conversation.

Listen before you conclude

Start with their view. Ask how they think the work is going, what they are proud of and what has been difficult. You will often learn about missing tools, unclear instructions or problems with a colleague that you could not see.

Then share your observations, beginning with what is working. Be honest about gaps, but describe the effect rather than the character. 'When reports are late, I cannot plan production' is easier to act on than 'You are unreliable'.

  • What I have noticed, with one or two examples
  • What effect it had on the team or customer
  • What I would like to see instead
  • What you need from me to make that possible

Agree specific next steps

End with a short list of agreed actions, each with a date. Keep it to two or three items; a long list means nothing gets done. Write them down together and share a copy the same day, so there is no later dispute about what was said.

If the person needs training, a better tool or clearer targets, commit to providing it. Feedback without support feels like blame.

Follow up, and know your limits

Put a check-in on the calendar two to four weeks ahead, and use it to acknowledge improvement as readily as you would raise a concern. Informal praise between reviews matters just as much.

Some situations go beyond a conversation: repeated problems after clear support, conduct issues, or anything involving harassment, discrimination or termination. In those cases, keep careful written notes and take advice from a qualified employment professional before acting. This article is about practice, not legal advice.

A helpful performance conversation is prepared with examples, opens with the person's own view, describes effects rather than labels, ends with two or three dated actions and is followed up. Hold short ones regularly instead of one painful one a year. Owners who do this often find that problems are smaller when they are discussed early, and that people respond better to being told than to being left guessing. If you want to practise the skill, a coach can role-play the difficult ones with you first.