Bring a situation, not a general ambition
“Become a better leader” is difficult to work on in one conversation. “I keep reversing my manager’s decisions in front of the team” gives you something specific to examine. Write down what happened, what you did and what you want to handle differently.
Bring only the information needed to understand the situation. An anonymised example, a decision log or your own calendar may be enough. Avoid sharing employee or customer details that are not relevant.
Review the previous commitment
Start by checking what you agreed to try last time. What happened, what did you observe and what got in the way? If you did not act, the reason is useful material for the conversation. Do not turn the review into a performance for the coach.
Separate an action you completed from a result you hoped for. You may have held the conversation you avoided and still need more work to resolve the issue. The session should help you learn from that difference.
Work through one decision in depth
The coach may ask what evidence supports your interpretation, which alternatives you have dismissed and what you are protecting. You retain responsibility for the decision. If the work requires specialist analysis or a new operating system, discuss whether consulting or another professional is needed.
Hypothetical example: an owner wants to stop answering every routine purchase query. The discussion could explore why they override agreed limits, what a manager needs to decide confidently and which exceptions genuinely require escalation. This describes a possible conversation, not a client outcome.
Leave with a small, observable action
Write a commitment that someone could verify without guessing your intentions. Instead of “trust the team more”, try “agree purchase limits with the manager and review exceptions at Friday’s check-in”. Choose a task within your authority and an appropriate level of risk.
Decide how you will record what happened. A few notes are enough. Ask what support, if any, is available between sessions and make sure that is part of the agreement.
- The action and its owner
- When you will do it
- What evidence you will bring back
- The circumstances that would make you stop or ask for help
Check whether the conversation is useful
After several sessions, review whether the work is helping you make clearer decisions and follow through. Pleasant conversations alone are not evidence of progress. Equally, one difficult session does not prove the approach has failed.
Ask for a change of focus or format when needed. Clarify confidentiality and any reporting to a sponsor before the engagement begins. Coaching should not substitute for legal advice, financial advice or clinical care.
Prepare one real situation, agree one practical action and bring back evidence of what happened. The work between sessions matters as much as the conversation.
